I see a bud. Be patient.

Happy Mother’s Day to all of you who are mothers today.

I hope your family is treating you well and making you feel very special. Of course, I’m sure they do that regularly, right?

I was blessed with a wonderful mother. She had a great role model in her mother. My childhood was made very special because of these two women. And since today is Mother’s Day, I won’t mention my dad or grandfather who also played important roles.

I think what I learned most from these two women was patience. I wasn’t born with the trait. I found it difficult more often than not to exhibit patience. Whenever I’d get frustrated or cranky because life wasn’t moving at the paced I wanted or expected, well I could count on hearing this phrase: “Patience is a virtue. Have it if you can.”

I find myself mumbling this phrase often. Sometimes it actually works.

But I can always count on one thing happening whenever I intone the maxim like a Gregorian chant. That is hearing the voices of Mom and Grandma saying it to me.

As a writer, my patience is constantly challenged. No matter the task or goal at hand, I always find myself waiting for something–cover art, editor’s responses, contracts, the end of the book–the list is endless…

Almost there. Be patient.

I have a wonderful supportive hubby. However, he prompts that chant also. Why? Because his framework for time is different than mine. Because we’ve been married coming up on 33 years, I’ve learned to keep my cool and give him different time frames. For example if we have to be somewhere by 7 PM, I tell him 6:30. Then I don’t get impatient.

Many years ago when I was pregnant, patience was one of those virtues I really didn’t want to exhibit at certain times. You know what I’m talking about–those last few weeks when really you are so ready to be a MOTHER–and that darling baby isn’t in the mood just yet.

I swear, my son Jimbo (who was more than a month overdue) challenged my patience the most. Even when labor was induced did he arrived quickly thereafter as the doctor expected and I hoped?

Of course not. he took his own sweet time. And pretty much followed that trait all of his life. He always got things done but in his timeframe. Another patience tester sent to challenge me. But I loved him dearly in spite of my impatience.

Several years ago, Jimbo gave me a Japanese peony plant for Mother’s Day. He even planted it for me. Not at the time we originally planned but a few hours later. (He’d been fishing.)

And this morning…

Well, every year since then, the plant would blossom, but never when I was around to see it or expecting it to blossom. For whatever reason, I’d catch it at the tight bud stage or at the very end when a wind or rain storm had torn most of the fragile petals from their stems.

But I kept my patience through the years. I knew that someday I’d be on that plant’s schedule.

Well, this has been the year. Just the right weather allowed me to actually see the blooms in their glory.

Patience is a virtue. Have it if you can.

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom and Gram.

They will be gone soon–maybe even tomorrow if we get rain tonight.

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15 Comments on “Patience–Really?”

  1. What a lovely post about a virtue that we have to have as writers and mothers especially. It seems I’m either waiting to hear back from an agent who requested materials or I’m waiting for one of my kids to come home from somewhere. I’m always in “have a bit of patience” mode.
    Happy Mom’s Day, Casey!

  2. Donna Marie Rogers Says:

    Beautiful post, Casey! It’s still such a strange thought to not be able to pick up the phone and wish my mom a Happy Mother’s Day. Our relationship certainly had its bumps, but she was the best mother she could be and I miss her very much. My grandma, too (though she’s been gone much longer). The two of them had a monthly movie date while I was growing up, and they would sometimes bring me along (depending on the movie…LOL). One of the most memorable movies for me was Dracula starring Frank Langella. They were so captivated by that movie, by the love story of Dracula & Mary…mostly the very sexy Frank Langella…LOL I think I’ll watch it later tonight.

    Anyway, back to the subject, I’m not as patient a person as I used to think I was…LOL Having kids really hammered home that fact. Though you seem like such a patient person to me…yiou’ve always been patient with me. πŸ™‚

    Have a wonderful Mother’s Day! I sure wish I could have met your mother & grandmother both. Knowing what an amazing woman you are, I can only imagine how incredible both of them must have been. πŸ™‚

  3. Edie Ramer Says:

    Another lovely post. I’ve been saying the one thing consistent about writing is that everything takes longer than I planned. I think the same thing goes with life.

    The flower is lovely! Worth waiting for.

  4. Edie,

    The flower definitely is worth waiting for. And I so hear you about everything in writing requires patience. It’s even more demanding of that trait than pregnancy and parenting.

    Thanks for stopping by.

  5. Patti,

    Patience is required in writing and parenting but I think you’re like me and would never consider the drawbacks aren’t worth some patience. I think of all the wonderful skills my mother and grandma tried to teach me, that one is the one I’ve used most in my life. And believe me, for may early years it was questionable whether I ever listened. πŸ˜‰

    Thanks for stopping by and have a great mother’s day.

  6. Donna,

    Whenever you open up about your mother, my heart sings. Why? Because you’re willing to share a bit more of how you became the delightful treasure you are.

    I love the story about Dracula. Now Frank L I could understand, but not in Dracula. But she I have this aversion to vampires…

    Have a lovely mother’s day, sweetie.

  7. Boy, do I understand the need for patience and how hard and exhausting it can be to find it some days. πŸ™‚ I’m thrilled you got to see the peony bloom (I think Jimbo had a hand in that) and hope you had a beautiful day with those still with you and memories, too. Love you!

  8. Happy Mother’s Day … sorry I am a day late. Was “out” for the day. Yes, my second born was exactly one month from her due date. Patience? Me? Usually do not use those two words together. Yet, time has a way of wittling away at our insistance that everything should be like instant breakfast. Good thing I suppose … I hate those instant breakfast things. Enjoy this day and keep looking for new blooms πŸ™‚

  9. Yes. You’ve had to be patient in your life. Haven’t we all? But one month overdue? Dear Lord!

  10. Lorna,
    Oh, yes, and that month all he did was gain weight. The largest of my babies at 10 pounds. And he was the last of my babies… πŸ˜‰

    Thanks for stopping by and I hope you had a great Mom’s Day.

  11. Florence,

    Another mother who had a 10 month pregnancy. So you know. I’ve become so much more patient about most things, but when I get overtired, then that patience flies away as fast as money does with bill paying.

    I hope you had a marvelous mother’s dad.

  12. Stacey,

    I had a marvelous day and I hope you did also. I did however have to use patience just a bit. Can’t ever get away from that.

    This morning when I let Oreo out for her morning bathroom business, I checked on the peony. They are pretty much gone…;-(

    Today it’s back to working on cover art and line editing. Sounds like a very good day for patience.

    Thanks for stopping by.

  13. So, I’m not the only person that lacks patience? Nice post Mary Jo–and wonderful photos, as usual.

    I miss my mother, too, and she certainly pointed out that I needed a dose of patience sometimes–with her! But we were close in many ways, and shared enthusiasm for many of the same things–including being an avid reader. She was proud that I pursued a writing career. I also think she did me a great service by not romanticizing motherhood or speaking in platitudes. She saw it as a choice one makes, and not having kids was an equally valid option–that made her a good friend to women whose families pressured them about having kids or expressed disappointment when they didn’t. I chose to have kids and adore mine–but I admit there were times it seemed so difficult.

    Love those peonies.

  14. Definitely a good day for patience. But when you need a break, go check out my blog post for today. It’ll give you a good laugh. πŸ™‚

  15. Virginia,

    I suspect I would have liked your mother had I the chance to meet her. And thank you for sharing a bit about her.
    Regarding the peonies. They are so different from the ones we usually see that are so heavy and full of petals. These remind of two hands cupped together and I’ve only seen them in the buttery soft creamy yellowish white.

    Thanks for stopping by. πŸ™‚

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