Fill The Bucket

Na Pali Coastline is gorgeous

Yesterday afternoon as I was caring for our youngest son who is severely disabled, I received a phone call from my oldest son. At the moment he’s in Kauai Hawaii instead of Alaska. (Wise choice, I’d say, considering the winter Alaska has had so far. πŸ™‚ Β )

Anyway, our conversation wasn’t overly long. He was on his way to see yet another part of that beautiful and lovely warm–79 degrees–he mentioned, but he wanted to check in to see if all was well with us back here since we got a serious taste of winter over the past week. (And yes, we’ve been spoiled this season which only made the week more miserable.)

But after we finished our conversation and I was sure both my oldest was in good shape, I thought about the trip my hubby and I made to that same island to celebrate our 11th wedding anniversary. Now you might be wondering why the odd number?

Well, he was a widower who’d been married 10 years when his first wife died tragically. I was a divorced woman who’d stayed 10 years in a marriage before I had the sense and gumption to end it.

Let's celebrate! He's almost done...

So, we both knew we could easily make 10, but 11? Well, if we accomplished that, we deserved to celebrate. We chose a place we’d both always wanted to see but had never been: perfect choice for a couple who had marital baggage.

Plus, a trip like this was on our individual bucket lists. (See, my title does fit. πŸ™‚ Β )

Now, since I’ve been fighting a nagging headache all week, my brain cells have been flitting around faster than dragonflies during a mosquito infestation. So what thought popped into my head?

The comment my hubby made sometime in the last few months (repeated several times since) about having all the items on his bucket list checked off but one and he wasn’t at all sure he’d ever get to do that. What?

The first time he said that, after I picked my multiple chins up from the floor, I asked if he was telling me he was terminal or planning on kicking the bucket which contained his lists sooner than I wanted. He said no but was proud of the fact that he’d done what he wanted with his life.

Well, darn…I’m not that much younger than he is but my list keeps growing and I’ve still got items on it from years ago! So, what’s wrong with this picture, folks? I need some serious help here.

Suggestions please.

Or maybe I need to figure out how I can live to be 150, but look and feel like a healthy, energetic 55 year-old woman. Or maybe…

Do you have any ideas? Help me fill my bucket, please.

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19 Comments on “Fill The Bucket”

  1. I’ve never thought too hard about a bucket list, but the older I get, the more I realize how short life is. That just sucks. So far, the biggest thing on my list is writing for a living, and I’m getting there. A few others travel-wise are a trip to Alaska, a cruise, and yes, Hawaii. Only I’d probably need your wisdom about getting those done, not the other way around.

    I guess my best advice is as long as you’re still crossing off things on your bucket list, keep that puppy filled! Maybe that’ll keep you young. It’s when you stop crossing off that it’s not good.

    Good for hubby with his list, he should be proud, but I also think he should add a few more…he doesn’t want to just sit around now, does he? πŸ˜‰

  2. Edie Ramer Says:

    MJ, you should send this in a letter to Betty White. She might have some good advice.

  3. Great suggestion, Edie!

  4. Well, Casey, I have to tell you how amazed I am that I’m in my 50’s and I have a ton of things I still want to do and am not even close to “kicking the bucket”, so to speak. I just started writing about 3 years ago and have written four books and am charged up about the entire writing thing. One was just pubbed on Jan. 6th and one is under contract and will be out this year and the other two I’m sending query letters out for. I own a horse and just finished a year-long training so I could ride him and he and I are doing fabulously. I have two teenage kids and a hubby and two large labs. I have TOO much that I want to do and too many humanoids and animals to care for to have time to draw up a bucket list. I’m living a great life right now and don’t EVEN want to go to that place that says “I’m old”. I’ve seen too many people our age just give it up because they consider themselves over middle-age, so why the heck try anything new? I hate that mindset and believe it’s mind over matter. I’ve never been healthier or exercised more in my life. Age, to me, REALLY is a mindset…. Sorry for the rant. It’s just that my sister, who is a couple of years older than I am, really does think she has one foot in the grave already! Drives me nuts!

  5. Stacey,

    I think when hubby mentioned his accomplishment, so t speak, he saw it as something to be proud of. But now he’s busy adding more things.

    For me, I figure I better get going on accomplishing more or I’ll have to live until I’m as old as Methusaleh. πŸ™‚

    Thanks for stopping by. πŸ™‚

  6. Ah, Betty… What a lady she is. I love that she keeps going and going, like the energizer bunny. πŸ™‚

  7. Patti,

    I wouldn’t consider your comment a rant at all. I’ve seen photos you’ve posted of your horse and I’m so impressed that you can handle a horse that size.

    And your achievements are excellent with your books. Congratulations with that. Your first one is one my TBR pile.

    Oh, and I agree that old is a state of mind and I don’t intend to wallow in that state.

    Have a good week!

  8. Deb Maher Says:

    Living to 150, with the energy of a 55 year old sounds like a great thing. I’ll help you keep watch on this post’s comments in case anyone figures out how it can be done. ; )

    It’s wonderful that Jim has done so much on his list, and more wonderful still that he’s now adding to it! You have a great guy, MJ. Life is to be lived to its fullest. Someday I’d love to sit down with you and see more pictures from your trips.

  9. Oh Deb, I took so many on the Hawaii trip and didn’t have the time or energy to go looking for them today. I really must get my trip photos out where they are more accessible to scan as I could use it. I did get some fabulous photos of hot lave close up and a couple of double exposures which photographers have praised.

    But I’d like that remedy for more days and hours to accomplish all I want. πŸ™‚

    Thanks for stopping in.

  10. Elle J Rossi Says:

    Well, yesterday I attempted snowboarding for the first time. I crashed. Hard. And felt every bone rattle. That was the first time I’d ever felt as if I were “getting older”. Which lead me to deeper reflection on what I’ve done so far with my life. I’ve done a lot but not nearly enough. I need to get my tail in gear and start doing even more.

    I did get back up and strap the snowboard on two more times. I crashed each time but I did learn to fall differently! Success! Only half my bones rattled on the third fall!!!

  11. Anne Parent Says:

    It doesn’t surprise me that you’re still adding to your bucket list. You’re one of the most vibrant women I know. I like the idea of 150, nice round number. And, you still have to have a NYT best seller.

  12. Good grief Casey, since several people have mentioned the age-thing, I will add my take. For some the bucket list begins at a very young age, ticking things off as they go. For others, the list changes with age and vintage. I love the idea that the list may contain accomplishments, a desired career path, an accolade in our chosen vocation. I keep other things on my bucket list: to travel through the lower forty-eight in an RV, go the entire length of the Missippissi in a paddle boat, take a transcontinental train across Canada, or ride the rapids of the Colorado River in the middle of the Grand Canyon. The high country of the Rockies, or the out islands of Maryland and the Carolinas. Don’t know even if I live to be 150 if I can get to all of it, but I researve the bucket list for for the entire enchalada. Of course, a couple of NYT Best Sellers wouldn’t be too bad either πŸ™‚

  13. Congratulations on your 11th anniversary! πŸ™‚

    As for a “Bucket List,” I don’t have one. I just do what I do from day to day and I’m happy with that. I try to keep things real simple!

  14. Anne,

    With readers such as you who love what I write and tell others about it, maybe that NYT will happen in year 120? πŸ˜‰

    And vibrant? You are so kind–today I feel a bit like the weather…

    Have a great week.

  15. Ramblings,

    I’d prefer to not think of the bucket list as age related but an ongoing project just as you do. I suspect the movie Bucket List may have indelibly added to that age/death thing.

    Many items on your list reflect mine, though I’ve been to Hawaii and Alaska several times. I have a few states yet to see and that rail trip across Canada. Oh, and I want to drive the Al-Can highway to Alaska some day. Oh, and so many more…

    Thanks for stopping by. πŸ™‚

  16. Lorna,

    Ah, 11 was many years ago and I still love the man. He was among the top decisions in my life and he never ceases to amaze me.

    Keeping things simple is always best.

    Keep writing. πŸ™‚

  17. Elle,

    I love the snowboarding concept. Were you wearing stiletos on the board? Great image that. And now you’ve crossed off an item on the list–even if you do it again and again–the first time is done and over. πŸ™‚

  18. Mair Says:

    MJ, I don’t have a bucket yet. Haven’t had enough time to find one big enough! I think I need more than one. Mair

  19. Casey Says:


    You’ve got a bucket, but it’s a gourd! And you keep refilling it with each new project and trip you take. You rock, woman!

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